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At AskEllie, we’re passionate about using AI to make a real difference in the lives of families navigating the challenges of neurodiversity, special educational needs, and mental health. But with AI becoming more powerful and widespread, it’s natural for people to ask important questions: Can AI be used ethically? Can it really help with something as sensitive as mental health?

We believe the answer is yes — if it’s done right.

The Problem

Accessing mental health support is harder than ever. Long waiting lists, overwhelmed services, and underfunded systems mean that too many families are left struggling alone. For parents of autistic or PDA children, this can be especially difficult. The emotional toll, the paperwork, the burnout — it can feel endless.

How AI Can Help

AI isn’t a replacement for therapists or real human connection. But it can help in meaningful and ethical ways:

• Listening and Understanding: AI can provide instant support 24/7. Sometimes, just being heard makes a difference. AskEllie lets users talk through their situation and get guidance based on facts, not opinions.
• Empowering, Not Replacing: Ethical AI supports human decision-making. Our tool gives parents the knowledge and confidence to ask the right questions, access support, and challenge injustice — without taking away their voice.
• Reducing Bureaucracy Burnout: AI can sift through legal processes, offer draft responses to councils or schools, and explain complex rights in plain English. That means less time Googling and more time connecting with your child.
• Anonymity When You Need It: Many people feel ashamed or judged for asking for help. AI doesn’t judge. It’s a private space where parents can be honest and vulnerable, without fear.

Our Promise

At AskEllie, we believe in ethical AI. That means:

• No data selling. Ever.
• Transparency about how the tool works.
• Constant updates based on real feedback from parents.
• Collaboration with lived-experience communities.

We’re not here to replace human support — we’re here to fill the gaps where support doesn’t exist. Until every family has the help they need, we’ll keep building tools that listen, empower, and advocate.

Because no parent should have to face this alone.

If your child is struggling to attend school, you’re not alone. A growing number of families are facing what’s known as EBSA — Emotionally Based School Avoidance — and it’s often misunderstood. Many parents are being blamed or threatened with fines, even when their children are experiencing real mental health distress.

What Is EBSA?

Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA) refers to children and young people who find it extremely difficult to attend school due to emotional distress. It’s not defiance. It’s not bad parenting. It’s a sign of burnout, anxiety, unmet needs, or masking all day just to survive.

Signs to Look Out For:

• Panic or meltdowns before school
• Physical symptoms like headaches or stomach aches
• Refusal to get dressed or leave the house
• Shutdowns or violent outbursts
• Extreme fatigue after school or weekends

Why It Happens:

• Undiagnosed or unsupported SEND (e.g., autism, ADHD, PDA)
• Sensory overwhelm
• Lack of reasonable adjustments
• Bullying or trauma
• Pressure to perform and mask

What Parents Can Do:

1. Document Everything: Keep a log of school difficulties, symptoms, and communications.
2. Request an EHCP Assessment: You do NOT need a diagnosis to apply.
3. Push for a Needs-Based Approach: The school must make reasonable adjustments — diagnosis or not.
4. Get Medical Evidence: Ask your GP for a letter to support attendance challenges.
5. Contact Your LA: If no suitable education is being provided, request Alternative Provision (AP).
6. Know Your Rights: You cannot be fined if your child is too ill (emotionally or physically) to attend.

You’re Not Alone.

Thousands of families across the UK are fighting this same battle. That’s why we built AskEllie — a free, AI-powered tool designed to help parents of SEND children know their rights, write letters, and get the support their children deserve.

🔗 Visit www.askellie.co.uk to start getting answers, support, and the power to push back.

If your child has an Education, Health and Care Plan (EHCP), you may already know how stressful it can be to secure the right school placement—especially when you’re aiming for a specialist provision.

One of the most common roadblocks parents face is being told:
“We can’t offer a place because the school is full.”

It sounds final, doesn’t it? But here’s what the local authority doesn’t always explain:

The Law Is Clear

Under the Children and Families Act 2014, if a school is named in your child’s EHCP (Section I), that school is legally required to admit your child, even if it’s full.

A local authority cannot refuse your preferred school just because it’s full. They can only refuse if they can clearly show that:

1. The school is unsuitable for your child’s age, ability, aptitude or special educational needs;
2. The placement would negatively impact the education of other children;
3. It would not be an efficient use of public resources.

Simply saying a school is “at capacity” doesn’t meet these criteria.

Why Do They Say It Then?

The reality is that some local authorities use the “full” excuse to:

• Delay making a decision
• Push your child toward a cheaper or more convenient option
• Avoid expanding specialist provision or providing additional support

What Should You Do?

If you’ve been told your chosen school is full:

• Request the school be named in Section I of the EHCP anyway. You have the right to ask for it.
• If refused, appeal to the SEND Tribunal. Over 95% of appeals by parents are successful.
• Ask the school directly if they believe they could meet your child’s needs—sometimes they’re more open than the LA.

Need Help?

If you’re unsure how to word your request or respond to the LA, our free tool AskEllie can help you draft emails, letters, and even appeal submissions based on UK SEND law.
Visit www.askellie.co.uk to get started.

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Don’t let “we’re full” be the end of the road.
If the school is right for your child, you’re within your rights to pursue it—and win.

Despite rising demand, urgent calls from families, and overwhelming evidence of a broken SEND system, the 2025 Spring Budget offered no new funding or practical support for children with Education, Health and Care Plans (EHCPs).

This silence speaks volumes. Thousands of families across the UK are desperately trying to get the right education and care in place for their neurodivergent children, yet the government has failed to act.

❌ What Was Missing?

• No new EHCP funding despite record waiting times and tribunal backlogs.
• No additional support for Local Authorities to deliver plans that are already in place.
• No action on special school capacity, despite many being oversubscribed and turning children away.
• No clarity on SEND reform proposals still stuck in consultation and pilot phases.

Instead, the focus turned to welfare and working families.

⚠️ Carers Could Be Asked to Work More

Hidden in the detail of the Budget were proposals that could place more pressure on unpaid carers, especially parents of disabled children who currently receive Universal Credit. The Chancellor reaffirmed plans to:

• Increase expectations for claimants to prove they are actively preparing for work.
• Review Limited Capability for Work rules, which could affect carers and parents of children with high needs.
• Link benefits more closely to conditionality, even for those with caring responsibilities.

For many parents, the idea of working full-time is simply not realistic. Caring for a child with autism, ADHD, PDA or complex SEND is already a full-time job.

🤝 How AskEllie Can Help

At AskEllie, we believe every family deserves support, clarity, and strength in numbers. If you’re:

• Struggling to get an EHCP or facing delays
• Being pressured to send your child into an unsuitable school
• Worried about benefit changes and what they mean for you

Ellie can help you with:

• ✉️ Drafting letters to schools, local authorities, or DWP
• ⏰ Understanding legal deadlines and your rights
• 💰 Benefit guidance (DLA, PIP, UC) and what to do if you’re being asked to work more hours
• 📃 Templates to respond to tribunals, reviews or complaints

🚨 Your Voice Matters More Than Ever

We’re collecting real stories from parents and carers to take to Parliament. If you’re struggling or have been let down by the system, share your experience here:

🔗 Submit Your Story

Change won’t come from the top. It will come from all of us, together.

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📢 If you’re worried about how the Budget affects your family, visit www.askellie.co.uk and get free support, advice, and solidarity.

You’re not alone. And you shouldn’t have to figure this out on your own.

— The AskEllie Team

Today, the Chancellor delivered the 2025 Spring Budget—and while many headlines will focus on tax cuts and economic forecasts, we know what families with disabled children are really asking:

“What does this mean for us?”

Here’s what we’ve learned so far—and how it could affect people claiming PIP, Universal Credit, and other DWP benefits.

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💷 What’s Changing in the Budget?

While we’re still reviewing the full details, several key announcements directly impact disabled people and carers:

1. Disability Benefits Are Under Reform

The government confirmed that it will press ahead with major welfare reforms—including how Personal Independence Payment (PIP) is assessed.

• They claim the number of people claiming PIP is “unsustainable,” particularly among young people with mental health conditions.
• A new consultation has been launched on tightening eligibility and changing how support is delivered—potentially replacing cash payments with service-based support.
• There are concerns this could disproportionately affect families with children who are autistic, have PDA, ADHD, or mental health needs.

⚠️ If you or your child are currently claiming PIP, your support will not stop immediately, but future eligibility could become harder.

2. Universal Credit Changes

While no major new cuts were announced, the Budget reaffirms policies already in motion:

• More people will be asked to increase work hours under Universal Credit, including those who previously had limited capability due to caring or health needs.
• Some carers and single parents may face more pressure to work, even while supporting disabled children.

Many families are already under enormous strain trying to balance care with impossible work demands. These changes may worsen that pressure.

3. No New Support for EHCP Families

Despite growing calls for reform of the SEND crisis, there was no mention of new funding for Education, Health and Care Plans (EHCPs) or specialist school placements—leaving many families concerned that the support their children need will remain out of reach.

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😔 What Families Are Saying

We’ve been flooded with messages from parents this week. Here are just a few of the most common fears:

• “Will my child lose their PIP?”
• “If I can’t work because I care full-time, what happens when UC pressures me to?”
• “Why are we always the ones left behind?”

If you’re feeling confused or worried—you are not alone.

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🛡 What You Can Do Right Now

✅ Start gathering evidence: If you’re on PIP or planning to apply, now is the time to keep records, collect letters from schools, doctors, and therapists, and document the impact of your child’s condition.

✅ Talk to AskEllie: Our free tool gives you instant help on your legal rights, how to apply for benefits, and what to do if support is denied. We’re built by parents, for parents—visit: www.askellie.co.uk

✅ Share your story: We’re collecting real-life experiences to take to Parliament and make sure families like yours are heard. Add your voice to the growing movement:
👉 Submit Your Story Here

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📣 Final Thoughts

This Budget shows that the fight is far from over. While politicians talk about numbers, we know this is about real families—already at breaking point—being asked to give even more.

We will keep fighting to make sure your voices are heard.

We’ll be updating this post as more details emerge, including how to respond to the government’s new PIP consultation.

🧡 Stay strong. Stay loud. And know you’re not alone.

—
✍️ Written by the AskEllie Team – Parents. Advocates. Fighters.

For many parents of autistic children, navigating sensory challenges can feel like a daily rollercoaster. From bright lights to noisy classrooms, the world can be overwhelming. And when too much becomes way too much, meltdowns often follow. But the more we understand sensory overload, the better we can support our children.

What Is Sensory Overload?

Sensory overload happens when one or more of the body’s senses become overstimulated. This could be from:

• Loud noises
• Crowded spaces
• Bright or flickering lights
• Uncomfortable clothing
• Strong smells or tastes

To a neurotypical person, these things may seem minor. But to a child with autism, they can feel completely overpowering and inescapable.

Signs of Sensory Overload

Every child is different, but some common signs include:

• Covering ears or eyes
• Repetitive movements (rocking, flapping)
• Refusing to enter certain environments
• Increased anxiety or aggression
• Complete emotional shutdown or a full-blown meltdown

Understanding Meltdowns

Meltdowns are not tantrums. They are not about “getting their way.” They are a child’s intense response to overwhelm and distress. During a meltdown, your child may scream, cry, lash out, or withdraw completely. They are not in control of these reactions—and they need support, not punishment.

How Can You Help?

1. Know the Triggers Keep a diary of when and where meltdowns happen. Patterns may emerge that help you identify sensory triggers.
2. Create a Calm Space Designate a sensory-friendly area at home or school with soft lighting, calming textures, noise-cancelling headphones, or weighted blankets.
3. Use Visuals and Warnings Give your child a heads-up before transitions or changes in routine. Visual schedules can help reduce anxiety.
4. Offer Sensory Tools Fidget toys, chewable jewellery, or noise-reducing ear defenders can help regulate input.
5. Stay Calm and Reassuring When a meltdown does happen, your calm presence is powerful. Avoid punishment. Instead, provide safety, understanding, and comfort.

And Remember…

You’re not alone. Supporting a child with sensory processing differences is challenging, but you are doing your best. AskEllie was built by parents just like you. We understand the chaos, the worry, the love, and the exhaustion.

If you’re unsure what support your child is entitled to in school or through a formal diagnosis, AskEllie can help.

🔗 www.askellie.co.uk

You’re doing an amazing job. One step at a time.

f you’re a parent of a child with Special Educational Needs and Disabilities (SEND), you may already know the crushing experience of being told “no” by school after school. But what happens when every school in your area says they can’t meet your child’s needs? Sadly, this is becoming a common and devastating reality for families across the UK.

The Problem: Families are being left in limbo. Children are out of school for months—sometimes years—while local authorities scramble to find a setting that will accept them. Even with an EHCP (Education, Health and Care Plan) in place, some schools refuse on the grounds of being unable to meet need, citing budget constraints, staffing shortages, or space issues.

Parents are told to wait. To be patient. But time drags on, and the child’s mental health, academic progress, and sense of self-worth deteriorate.

The Legal Bit: Under Section 42 of the Children and Families Act 2014, local authorities have a legal duty to secure the special educational provision specified in Section F of an EHCP. If no local schools will take the child, the local authority must look further afield, including independent and out-of-area placements.

Refusal by schools does not remove the LA’s obligation.

What Parents Can Do:

1. Request a full list of schools approached and their reasons for refusal. This should be documented.
2. Challenge the LA. If they claim no school will accept your child, ask what action they’re taking to resolve this.
3. Appeal the named placement. If your final EHCP names a school that refuses to take your child, you have the right to appeal to SENDIST.
4. Use AskEllie. Our free legal chatbot can help you understand your rights and draft formal communications to the local authority.

Why This Matters: Leaving children out of education has long-term consequences. They lose learning, friendships, and trust in the system. For parents, it’s a relentless battle that feels isolating and never-ending.

And it’s not rare. AskEllie has spoken to hundreds of parents across the UK who are in the exact same position.

Final Thoughts: This isn’t just a bureaucratic issue. It’s a crisis. No child should be left without education. No family should have to chase 15 schools and hear 15 rejections. Until there’s real reform, we must keep sharing our stories, raising awareness, and helping each other push back.

You’re not alone. And Ellie is here to help.

Need help getting your child into school? Visit www.askellie.co.uk and let us support you today.

Over the past decade, we’ve seen an alarming rise in the number of people in the UK relying on welfare benefits—particularly among young adults with emotional and behavioural needs. Politicians and headlines call it a “welfare crisis.” But what if this crisis didn’t start in the DWP… what if it began in our schools?

The government has claimed that the increase in disability benefit claims is unsustainable, and that reform is needed. One of the most cited reasons is the growing number of young people needing support for anxiety, autism, and other neurodivergent profiles. But here’s the thing: this trend isn’t mirrored in other similar nations.

So what’s going wrong in the UK?

Let’s go back to 2010. A five-year-old child back then would be 19 or 20 today—the exact age group now dominating the spike in benefit claims. But what else happened in 2010? Austerity. Cuts to schools. Cuts to social care. Cuts to early intervention services. It’s no coincidence.

SEND Crisis, Lifelong Impact

We’ve spent years campaigning for change in the SEND (Special Educational Needs and Disabilities) system. Ask any parent or teacher, and they’ll tell you: the system is buckling. EHCPs take months or years to get. CAMHS is overwhelmed. Mainstream schools are stretched so thin, they can’t support the children who need it most.

So what happens to those children?

Some fall out of education altogether. Some spend their most formative years without the support they need to thrive. And some—despite their resilience and the dedication of their families—arrive at adulthood burnt out, unsupported, and unable to work in traditional environments.

Is it any wonder that benefit claims are rising?

Cutting SEND Will Cost More Later

The government is currently proposing further changes to SEND funding—more hoops, less support, stricter criteria. All in the name of cost-cutting.

But this isn’t just about children. This is about the adults they become. This is about whether we invest in our future now—or pay for our failure later.

Because here’s the uncomfortable truth: when we deny children early support, we don’t save money. We shift the cost from the education budget to the welfare budget. And in the process, we hurt families, we lose potential, and we create deeper, longer-term struggles that take far more to fix.

Where Do We Go From Here?

At AskEllie, we hear from parents every day who are fighting for their children’s right to an education. We also hear from young people who’ve been failed by the system and are now facing mental health crises, unemployment, and isolation.

We believe that every child deserves support when they need it—not when it’s too late.

The SEND crisis and the welfare crisis are not two separate issues. They are deeply connected. And unless we treat the root causes—starting in the classroom, not the job centre—we’ll continue to see both spiralling.

It’s time to stop blaming parents. Stop blaming young people. And start fixing the broken system.

We need better funding, faster support, and a government that listens to families instead of punishing them.

Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) is a profile of autism that is increasingly recognised by families, educators, and professionals alike, yet it still remains widely misunderstood and often overlooked in the diagnostic process. In this blog post, we explore the common signs of PDA autism, why it can be so hard to get a formal diagnosis, and the best ways you can support your child emotionally and mentally.

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What is PDA?

PDA is a subtype of autism spectrum disorder (ASD) characterised by an extreme avoidance of everyday demands and a need to feel in control. Children with PDA often experience high anxiety, which fuels their avoidance and can lead to intense, explosive reactions when they feel overwhelmed.

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Key Signs of PDA Autism to Look Out For:

• Avoidance of everyday demands: This could be anything from brushing teeth, getting dressed, or completing schoolwork. Children with PDA often use distraction, excuses, negotiation, or even physical refusal.
• Seeming socially confident but with difficulty in real social relationships: They may appear chatty and sociable, but struggle with deeper connections and social rules.
• Intense need for control: Children may become extremely distressed if things don’t go their way, or if they feel powerless.
• Rapid mood changes and impulsive behaviour: Emotional regulation can be difficult, leading to sudden outbursts or shutdowns.
• Obsessive behaviour: Often related to people or interests, this can be a way of maintaining control and managing anxiety.
• Sensory sensitivities: Common in many autistic children, but particularly heightened when anxiety is involved.

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Why You Can’t Always Get a Full PDA Diagnosis

Although PDA is increasingly acknowledged, it is not currently a formally recognised standalone diagnosis in the DSM-5 or ICD-10 diagnostic manuals. This means many clinicians do not use “PDA” as a label in official reports. Instead, children are often diagnosed with ASD and the PDA profile is mentioned within the descriptive notes – if at all.

This leads to frustration for families, as many professionals (especially within the NHS or educational settings) may not fully understand PDA or recognise how it differs from typical presentations of autism.

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How to Best Support a Child with a PDA Profile

1. Adopt a low-demand approach: Remove unnecessary demands where possible. This doesn’t mean no structure, but rather being flexible, offering choices, and reducing pressure.
2. Use indirect language: Avoid direct commands. Try, “I wonder if we could…” or “Shall we try together?” instead of “You need to do this now.”
3. Build trust and safety: Relationships are everything. Your child needs to feel safe and respected before they will be able to engage.
4. Avoid power struggles: Don’t escalate the situation. Step back and give your child space to regulate.
5. Plan ahead for transitions: Use visual schedules, countdowns, and prepare for change gradually.
6. Focus on emotional support before behaviour: Meltdowns are usually a sign of distress, not defiance. Validate their emotions before addressing the behaviour.
7. Advocate in school: Many mainstream schools do not understand PDA. You may need to request reasonable adjustments or apply for an EHCP to get tailored support.

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Final Thoughts

Supporting a child with PDA can be emotionally exhausting, but understanding the root of their behaviours makes a huge difference. These children are not being naughty or manipulative – they are trying to survive in a world that feels overwhelming.

If you need guidance on navigating school, EHCPs, or legal support, AskEllie.co.uk is a free tool that helps parents like you get clear, instant answers tailored to UK law and processes.

You’re not alone – and with the right support, things can get better.

Getting an autism diagnosis for your child in 2025 can feel like navigating a broken system. For many families in the UK, it has become a waiting game of months—or even years—just to access the right support. And during that time, children are left without the understanding, interventions, and educational help they desperately need.

The Numbers Behind the Crisis

As of late 2024, over 212,000 people in England were on the NHS autism assessment waiting list. That’s a 23% increase in just one year and a staggering 82% increase since 2022. These figures are not just statistics—they represent children and families stuck in limbo.

The Children’s Commissioner reported that some children are now waiting more than four years for a diagnosis. For those referred through community paediatrics or CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services), two-year wait times are becoming the norm. This is not only unacceptable—it’s harmful.

What This Means for Families

A delayed diagnosis doesn’t just delay a label. It delays everything that comes with it:

• Access to EHCPs (Education, Health and Care Plans)
• Understanding from teachers and schools
• Appropriate educational provision or alternative provision
• Access to therapies such as speech and language, OT, or mental health support

Children who mask their struggles at school are especially vulnerable, as their needs often go unseen until they reach breaking point. Meanwhile, parents are left trying to prove that something is wrong while managing meltdowns, exclusions, and emotional exhaustion.

Why the System Is Struggling

The national autism strategy, introduced in 2021, set out a vision for change. It aimed to improve:

• Early identification
• Diagnostic capacity
• Integration across education, health, and social care

But despite these aims, the system is overwhelmed. Referrals have skyrocketed, while staffing and funding haven’t kept pace. And while the NHS has targets in place (assessments within 13 weeks), only 1 in 10 children are being seen within that window.

What Can You Do If You’re Waiting?

If you’re stuck in the waiting game, here are some practical steps:

1. Apply for an EHCP Anyway

You do not need a formal diagnosis to start the EHCP process. If your child has clear needs that affect their education, you can apply now. Visit AskEllie.co.uk for step-by-step guidance.

2. Gather Evidence

Start keeping a diary of behaviours, school struggles, and medical visits. This builds a timeline and helps professionals understand what you’re dealing with.

3. Speak to School SENCOs

Even without a diagnosis, schools can and should offer SEN support. That could include a key worker, reduced timetable, sensory breaks, or access to a nurture space.

4. Seek Support from Charities

• National Autistic Society
• Autism Central
• Contact (for families of disabled children)

These organisations offer guidance, helplines, workshops, and community support.

5. Push for Interim Support

While waiting, ask your GP or local services for early help, referrals to OT or SLT (speech and language therapy), or CAMHS support for emotional wellbeing.

Final Thoughts

A diagnosis is not a magic wand, but it can open doors. The sad reality is that in 2025, many of those doors are still locked behind long waiting lists and broken systems.

That’s why projects like AskEllie.co.uk were created—to support parents through the gaps. We help you understand your rights, draft EHCP requests, navigate DLA or PIP forms, and challenge unfair decisions. Because while the system may be failing, you don’t have to face it alone.

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If you’re a parent waiting on an autism diagnosis and unsure what to do next, visit www.askellie.co.uk for free legal guidance, templates, and real help.